It’s been almost a year since my last entry and life had been a one hell of a rollercoaster ride for me.

I’ll start with the sad stuff. I failed my first year in Med School. I was a disappointment to myself and everybody around me. I didn’t flunk just a subject or two. I only passed two freaking subjects. It shook me to my core. I was so lost, I didn’t know what to do. I knew that I wanted to be a doctor. I wanted to give it another try. But my father lost his faith in me, he hesitated in supporting me. He wanted me to start looking for jobs and just move on with life. I’m so lucky my mother still supported me. She did her best in convincing my father to give me another shot.

And they did. With two conditions, no study outs and no going out with friends for the whole semester. I started from scratch. First year all over again. It was sad to leave my friends from my previous school. But luckily, I met new people in the new one. They were all so welcoming and I love how our relationships with each other work. They became my support system in this new environment. As months passed, they became my family. This right here is another proof that you can’t survive med school alone. You need to have friends and people around you. Med school is already depressing so you have to surround yourself with people who gives you comfort and understands you.

Life in this new school have indeed been full of surprises from great friends to brilliant doctors. I am in awe of how both my mother and sister noticed that I was happier here. I really can’t tell. I just did my best to move forward and just go on with life.

I do miss my friends from my previous school. I wish I could visit them but my parents won’t let me. “That’s just rubbing salt to your wounds.” My mother said. Yes, it’s kinda true. Seeing them will just make me think of what-could-have-beens if I didn’t fail. But I can’t really do anything about it anymore because what’s done is done. Hopefully, one day soon, I’ll get to see them again.

Relationships? Nothing really serious for the past year. I’ve had flings. Both didn’t last long. In the first one, I fell for the person even though we both agreed that it was just for fun. The second one was someone I met online and since school began I didn’t really have the time for that. I’ve also had one admirer in school but I only see him as a friend. I wish I could have given more since he is a really good person. But I didn’t want to give him hope when I know that I wasn’t attracted to him that way. I just hope he’ll find someone who’ll reciprocate all the love he could give. Yeah, you could say I’m not really lucky in the relationship aspect of life. My karma after everything I’ve done, I guess.

But in general, life has been good to me. I got to ride the airplane for the first time and went to South Korea. Probably gonna write a separate blog for this. I also made new friends and family. I have a better performamce in school. And hopefully, this will continue for the rest of the year!